Wrath of The Vegetable Mojo
We are very sorry for breaking Torii Hunter. We like him too, especially when he beats the Yankees, and we apologize on behalf of the center field wall.(Bad Center Field Triangle, bad! No more breaking anybody's center fielders.)
However, we are not sorry that String Bean made the rest of your team his abject slaves. With a little help from The Legion of Infield Superheroes,including its new member, Tony "Batman" Graffanino*.
The Boston Red Sox
*Obviously mortal, but with a utility belt of tools such as infield defense, strike zone patience and a strong arm.